Nothing Personal (The Asshole Song)

v1. You've got a tendency of bending things
To see if they will break
And I just breathe as you're contorting me
Into familiar shapes

But I can sense you're unimpressed
It's not a talent I possess
To sit back and relax
While I'm being compressed

v2. And I can't stand your ampersands
I'm nothing but an afterthought in your hands
And, up until now, they've all been so compliant
But I'm not comfortable standing in the shadows of giants

*Chorus 1*
And it's nothing personal,
But you are kind of an asshole
And I'm not so flexible
But you align me and confine me to your angles

v3. My reflection is distorted when
I look into your eyes
In your trophy case, you'll save my place
As long as I abide

By your mundane chess game
Glass slippers and Mary-Janes
Another plastic mannequin
In your shop window display

v4. I can't think how it would have felt
Sitting alone, up on your shelf
Waiting for the dust to settle in my lungs
But it's unlikely, so unlike me to patiently hold my tongue

*Chorus 2*
Take your comparisons,
I'd much rather have rejection
Did that catch your attention?
What does it take to finally make an impression?
I wonder

v5. 'Cause you call it a commentary
I say it's unnecessary
If I were to qualify,
I'd hardly even recognize myself

And here, I thought I made it,
Gotta learn to read the fine print
You could open doors for me,
Just not as common courtesy

*Chorus 3*
Don't take my words so hard
Even though each of yours had me seeing stars
And I mean it from the heart
No offense, but I must send my disregards

I can't think how it would have felt
Sitting alone, up on your shelf
So unoriginal
And, up until now, they've all been so compliant
But I'm not comfortable
It's nothing personal